|
Post by Dr B on May 1, 2010 12:49:51 GMT -5
This fed keeps getting better & better!Storylines are nothing less than spectacular!Vincent Shawn Helmsley...this could be interesting! Hey my girls The C&C got a win off a double team!Cool,if you can't beat 'em...cheat 'em!
Dr B
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 3, 2010 12:07:13 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 2, 2125 * The Jackson Jills defeated the Sisters of Pain by disqualification when Debbie Hate tossed a chair at Peppermint Patty outside the ring as Patty dove off the apron for a double axhandle attempt. * Shannon Egans broke Sarah N. Dipity's undefeated streak when she pinned her with a hurricanrana. * Everything Nice defeated the Walk of Fame when Sugah pinned Barbie Blaze with the EYE CANDY. * Perry Noya pinned Ace Endehole with the TRUST ISSUES, breaking his own losing streak. * Bayne made Victor E. subit to the BAYNE-BREAKER. * Armageddon pinned Slap Stick with the APOCOLYPSE. * Harvard Yale pinned Scott Creed with the IVY LEAGUE. * The Killer Whales defeated the Ark Angels by disqualification following a brawl outside the ring between Michael and Orca. * Road-Rayge defeated Surf's Up when Roadkill pinned Ray-Ban with the Roadkill Cafe. * Val Kira pinned Pearl E. Gates with VAL KIRA'S RIDE. * Holly Pena defeated Abercrombie [censored] by count out following a springboard moonsault to the floor. * HWA TRI-PLANETARY TITLE MATCH: Big Poppa Roach retained the HWA Tri-Planetary title when he defeated Devil's Reject by count out following a springboard moonsault to the floor. * MAIN EVENT--HWA LADIES TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH[/u][/i]: 'Nuff's Enough once again became the HWA Ladies Tag Team champions, defeating the Queen Bees when Tuffy Nuff pinned "Beulah" with the SHO' 'NUFF. (We can't be certain whether or not it was Beulah because during the match, the Queen Bees successfully pulled off their "masked illegal switch" routine.) Be sure to join us Tuesday as we bring the Pinfalls In Paradise Heavyweight and Tag Team tournaments.
|
|
|
Post by Dr B on May 3, 2010 14:20:28 GMT -5
Great card!Pinfalls in Paradise?That sounds cool!
Dr B
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 4, 2010 12:02:26 GMT -5
PINFALLS IN PARADISE (An HWA Developmental Territory) HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars May 4, 2125 PIP ROSTERFACE | HEEL | HEFHAWG | FLOCK Leader--BLACK SHEEP (Managed by DAISY GRAZE) | PARTY HARTY | FLOCK Member--BRUDER GALGEN (Managed by DAISY GRAZE) | MOUSAWA | SALAMI JOE | DAVEY STORM | "BIG KITTY SNOOZE NO-SELL" KEVIN GNASH | LOST ANIMAL XCHANGE Reserve Member--BANDITO | BIG COCK MURDOCK | LOST ANIMAL XCHANGE (LAX)
| DAMN DIRTY APES
| ZERO GRAVITY
| MASTERS OF DARKNESS
|
(More signings will be forthcoming. The remainder of the PIP roster will consist of wrestlers and teams from the HWA roster that Vincent Shawn Helmsley decides to send down to PIP for re-training and/or re-tooling.) PIP HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE TOURNAMENTROUND ONE:[/U] * Saint Bernard pinned Davey Storm with the RESCUE MISSION. * Kevin Gnash pinned Party Harty with the BIG EASY POWER BOMB. * Bandito pinned Big Cock Murdock with the CRITTER KICK to earn a bye into the semi-finals. (Actually, Bandito rolled ROAD KILL, but since it was a tag finisher, I substituted the CRITTER KICK rather than re-roll.) * Black Sheep pinned Hefhawk with the COUNTING SHEEP to earn a bye into the semi-finals. * Bruder Galgen pinned Mousawa with the S.O.B. (actually he rolled the BLITZ KRIEG, but since it was a tag finisher, I substituted the S.O.B. rather than re-roll.) * Umagapotamus pinned Salami Joe with the SAMOAN HIPPO SPIKE. ROUND TWO* Saint Bernard pinned Kevin Nash with the CLOTHESLINE FROM DOGGY HEAVEN. * Bruder Galgen pinned Umagapotamus with the S.O.B. SEMI-FINAL ROUND* Saint Bernard pinned Bandito with the Saint Spinebuster. * Bruder Galgen pinned Black Sheep with the Andromeda Drop. PIP TAG TEAM TITLE TOURNAMENT SEMI-FINAL ROUND[/u] * The Masters of Darkness defeated LAX when King of Darkness pinned Skrit with the DARK DROP. * Zero Gravity defeated the Damn Dirty Apes when Hyperdrive rolled through a deathjump cross body attempt by Chimpan-Z. PIP HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE TOURNAMENT TITAN DEATH MATCH FINALS[/u] * Saint Bernard pinned Bruder Galgen with the CLOTHESLINE FROM DOGGY HEAVEN to become the PIP Heavyweight champion. PIP TAG TEAM TITLE TOURNAMENT TITAN DEATH MATCH FINALS[/u] * Zero Gravity defeated the Masters of Darkness to become the PIP Tag Team champions when Shooting Star pinned King of Darkness with the Star Drop.
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 8, 2010 10:26:43 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 8, 2125 * Halle Burton pinned Alison Chainz via ILLEGAL BRIEFS. * Mynx pinned Colly Flower via FOX HUNT. * The Destructive Forces defeated Surf's Up when Volcano pinned Body Glove with the ERUPTION. * Everything Nice defeated Walk of Fame when Sugah pinned Holly Wood with the EYE CANDY. * Epsilon Beta pinned Perry Noya via BETA MAX. * Boogie Lou pinned Billy B. with a deathjump cross body block. * Dewie Cheatam ALWAYS CHEATED to pin Slap Stick when he choked out the man from Clownworld with one of his wrist tapes. * Harvard Yale pinned Hurricane with the IVY LEAGUE. * The Ark Angels defeated the Killer Whales when Michael pinned Willy with a deathjump cross body block. * Val Kira pinned Pearl E. Gated via VAL KIRA'S RIDE. * Abercrombie [censored] pinned Val Hailey via the 69 DRIVER. * HWA HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH: Warren Peace pinned 666 with the ART OF WAR to hold onto the HWA Heavyweight title. * MAIN EVENT--HWA LADIES TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH[/I][/U]: The Queen Bees re-captured the HWA Ladies Tag Team titles from 'Nuff's Enough when Beulah pinned Justine Nuff with the SWARM ATTACK.
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 10, 2010 14:37:57 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 10, 2125 * Herman Glopp pinned Flexicon with a hurricanrana. * The Blue Dragon Dojo (Saiji Takahashi & Tokimasu Matsudaira) had a successful debut by defeating the Deadly Sins when Saiji pinned Levi Ethan with the TAKAHASHI SPECIAL. * The Sisters of Pain defeated Esther-Jenn by disqualificaiton when Esther repeatedly whipped Debbie Hate into the retaining barrier. * Aphrodi-Tina pinned Sarah N. Dipity with an Asai moonsault. * The C&C Connection defeated the Sisters at Heart when Chandra pinned Ambrosia with the CRESCENT KICK. * Victor E. pinned Dustin DeWind with the VICTOR E. PRESS. * Ace Endehole pinned King Kobra with the HEADSS UP. * The TNT Boyz defeated the Samoan Vice Squad when Tracey got a quick IMPLOSION pinfall victory over S'Nunu. * Armageddon pinned Bayne with the Sign of the Times. * Shannon Egans pinned Lucy Kannin with the CALLING SHENANIGANS. * Scott Creed pinned Ugly Coyote with MY SACRIFICE. * HWA TRI-PLANETARY TITLE MATCH: Big Poppa Roach pinned Gangurru with the ROACH MOTEL to retain the HWA Tri-Planetary title. * HWA LADIES TITLE MATCH: Demiah the Devil's Daughter pinned Holly Pena with a Death Valley Driver to retain the HWA Ladies title. * MAIN EVENT--HWA TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH[/U][/I]: the Annihilators defeated Road-Rayge to retain the HWA Tag Team titles when Pthalos pinned Rayge with the IMMINENT DESTRUCTION.
|
|
|
Post by Dr B on May 11, 2010 2:40:48 GMT -5
Great matches!My girls C&C get another big win!Annihilators are unbeatable!
Dr B
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 11, 2010 9:28:55 GMT -5
PINFALLS IN PARADISE (An HWA Developmental Territory) HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars May 11, 2125 NEW SIGNINGS THIS WEEK: FACE | HEEL | CALICO | DOLLY LAMMA | MAIDEN PATRIOT | PRINCESS BARBELLE | CHICKFIGHTER | | KINGS OF THE SWAMP
| SAMOAN CANNIBALS
| SILVERFANG | BROWN STARFISH | | GENERATION SWINE
SLAMPIGS
RAZORBACK BOSS HAWG (Razorback and Boss Hawg form the occasional tag team of PIGWRESTLING)
(Coming soon, LITTLE MISS PIGGY) | ANIMOSITY
|
(I have no idea who created the Samoan Headhunter, Samoan Enforcer, or Silverfang. They were cards sent to me many years ago through the mail and aren't even formatted to conform to the Filsinger Games guidelines, but for now, I'm leaving them as they are because I don't expect to use them for very long in PIP--DPB) * Calico defeated Dolly Lamma by count out due to a springboard moonsault to the floor. * Hefhawg pinned Black Sheep with the MONEY SHOT. * Bandito pinned Big Cock Murdock with the CRITTER KICK. (Actually, I rolled a 6, but since it's a tag finisher and Bandito was in a singles match, I substituted the CRITTER KICK to keep the game flowing.--DPB) * Mousawa pinned "Big Kitty Snooze No-Sell" Kevin Gnash with the Mouse Trap. (Or is the Mouse Trap a submission move? I forget.--DPB) * Party Harty pinned Salami Joe with the BOMBED SWAN. * Princess Barbelle pinned Maiden Patriot with the CROWN ROYALE. * The Damn Dirty Apes defeated LAX when Chimpan-Z pinned Pouch with a deathjump cross body block. * Kailani pinned Daisy Graze with the TROPICAL STORM. * Davey Storm used 3 RUNNING POWER SLAMs to pin Umagapotamus. * The Kings of the Swamp got a quick victory over the Samoan Cannibals when Croc Od'Ile pinned Samoan Headhuter with the Two Kings. * PIP TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: The Masters of Darkness are the new PIP Tag Team champions after King of Darkness pinned Hyperdrive with the SMASH INTO THE DARK. * MAIN EVENT--PIP HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH[/u][/i]: Saint Bernard pinned Bruder Galgen with the CLOTHESLINE FROM DOGGY HEAVEN to successfully defend the PIP Heavyweight title. Be sure to join us next Tuesday when Zero Gravity get the opportunity to win back the PIP Tag Team titles from the Masters of Darkness. And don't forget to catch the Heavenly Wrestling Association every Saturday and Monday.
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 15, 2010 8:51:20 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 15, 2125 * Flexicon pinned Herman Glop with MR. UNIVERSE. * The Destructive Forces defeated the debuting team of Snake Oil (Flim & Flam) when Volcano pinned Flam with the ERUPTION. * Sarah N. Dipity pinned Mynx with the HAPPY ACCIDENT. * Dustin DeWind pinned King Kobra with the POINT OF KNOW RETURN. * The Deadly Sins defeated Surf's Up when B.L. Zebob pinned Ray-Bay with a spinning leg lariat. * Val Hailey defeated Halle Burton by disqualification following a brawl outside the ring. * Boogie Lou pinned Slap Stick with the DISCO DUCK. * Bayne made Sheik Khalid Sirhan submit to the BAYNE-BREAKER. * In a match to determine a challenger for the HWA Tri-Planetary title this Monday, Armageddon pinned Ace Endehole with a spinebuster to earn the right to challenge Big Poppa Roach on Monday. * The Ark Angels defeated the Killer Whales when Michael pinned Orca with a frog splash. * Devil's Reject pinned Gangurru with the THUNDERKISS. * Val Kira pinned Pearl E. Gates with VAL KIRA'S RIDE. * HWA HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH Warren Peace pinned Harvard Yale with the ART OF WAR to retain the HWA Heavyweight title. * MAIN EVENT--HWA LADIES TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH[/U][/I]: Everything Nice are the new HWA Ladies Tag Team champions after Sugah made "Beulah" submit to a stretch muffler. (Nobody's really sure if it really was Beulah that submitted, as the Queen Bees managed to pull off their illegal "mask switch" during the match.)
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 18, 2010 17:34:17 GMT -5
(I aplologize for not posting these results yesterday, but I've been sick since Sunday night.) HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 17, 2125 * In a match that was supposed to take place last Saturday but was moved to today's card due to time constraints, the Sisters At Heart defeated the Sisters of Pain when Jenna Love was counted out due to a springboard moonsault to the floor by Ambrosia. * The Progressives defeated the Blue Dragon Dojo when Tokimasu Matsudaira was disqualified for tossing a chair at A-Flack outside the ring as A-Flack dove off the top turnbuckle for a double axhandle attempt. * Esther-Jenn defeated the Walk of Fame when Esther pinned Holly Wood with the MENOPAUSE. * Dingo made Perry Noya tap out to a triangle choke. * Aphrodi-Tina defeated Colly Flower and Bootylicious Bertha in a Triple Threat match when she pinned Colly with a frog splash. * 'Nuff's Enough defeated the C&C Connection when Tuffy Nuff pinned Carissa with a hurricanrana. * Alison Chainz pinned Shannon Egans with a deathjump cross body block. * Victor E. made Billy B. tap out to a Boston Crab. * Epsilon Beta pinned Dewie Cheatham with the BETA MAX. * The Samoan Vice Squad defeated the TNT Boyz when S'Nunu pinned Tracey with the SAMOAN SMASHER. * Ugly Coyote pinned Hurricane with the MESA MOON HOWL. * Scott Creed pinned 666 with a dropkick. * HWA TRI-PLANETARY TITLE MATCH: Big Poppa Roach pinned Armageddon with the ROACH MOTEL to successfully defend the HWA Tri-Planetary title. * HWA LADIES TITLE MATCH: Demiah the Devil's Daughter is still the HWA Ladies champion after pinning Abercrombie [censored] with a Death Valley Driver. * MAIN EVENT--HWA TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH[/U][/I]: Road-Rayge captured the HWA Tag Team titles from the Annihilators when Rayge pinned Krogon with the DEVASTATION.
PINFALLS IN PARADISE (An HWA Developmental Territory) HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 18, 2125 * Brown Starfish made a successful debut as he forced Black Sheep to tap out to the CORNHOLE MUTILATION. * Boss Hawg pinned Big Cock Murdock with the SAUSAGE FEST. * "Big Kitty Snooze No Sell" Kevin Gnash pinned Hefhawg with a deathjump cross body block. * Animosity had a successful debut as they defeated the Samoan Cannibals when the Samoan Enforcer was disqualified due to a brawl outside the ring with Flaw. * Bandito pinned Razorback with the CRITTER KICK. * Maiden Patriot pinned Daisy Graze with the MAIDEN MISSILE. * Silverfang pinned Salami Joe with the SILVERFANG KILL. * Mousawa pinned Umagapotamus with the RODENT ELBOW in the first match to be considered to be a candidate for PIP Match of the Year. (At the end of the match, Mousawa's PIN rating was 9, while Umagapotamus' was 11.--DPB) * The SlamPigs had a successful debut when they defeated the Lost Animal Exchange when Boar pinned Skrit with a choke slam. * Chickfighter had a successful debut when she pinned Dolly Lamma with the Chick Kick. * Bruder Galgen pinned Party Harty with the S.O.B., but then after the match, Black Sheep entered the ring and helped Bruder perform repeated double deathjumps on Harty, putting him out of action for 2 shows. * Kailani extended her winning streak to 2, as she pinned Princess Barbelle with a moonsault. * The Damn Dirty Apes defeated the Kings of the Swamp when G-Rilla pinned Croc Od'Ile with the G-RILLA PRESS. * PIP TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: Zero Gravity once again became the PIP Tag Team champions, defeating the Masters of Darkness when Shooting Star pinned Prince of Darkness with the HURRIKICK. * MAIN EVENT--PIP HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH[/i][/u]: Davey Storm became the new PIP Heavyweight champion when he pinned Saint Bernard with the RUNNING POWER SLAM. Next week, Saint Bernard gets the opportunity to re-capture the PIP Heavyweight title from Davey Storm, and the Flock will answer for their brutal post-match attack on Party Harty.
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 22, 2010 11:59:57 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 22, 2125 * Flexicon made Herman Glopp submit to MR. OLYMPIA. * The Jackson Jills defeated the Sisters of Pain when Julie pinned Debbie Hate with a Chick Kick. * Esther-Jenn defeated the Walk of Fame when Esther pinned Holly Wood with the MENOPAUSE. After the match, as Holly continued to fight with Esther, Barbie Blaze grabbed Jenn by the hair and pulled her over the top rope into the ring and then proceeded to tangle her arms in the middle and bottom rope. As the referee struggled to free Jenn, Barbie and Holly decided to humiliate Esther by tearing the muumuu that Esther wears to the ring to shreds, revealing her bra and "granny panties" as the crowd jeered. * The Samoan Vice Squad defeated the Destructive Forces when Tornado was disqualified for repeatedly whipping Tika into the security barrier. * The C&C Connection defeated the debuting Molto Bellas (Bella Donna & Bella Nora) when Chandra made Bella Nora submit to a bridging leglock. * Shannon Egans pinned Sarah N. Dipity with the Erin Go Bragh. * King Kobra made Billy B. tap out to the KOBRA KROSS KLUTCH. * Dewie Cheatham forced Ace Endehole to submit to a belly-to-back bear hug. After the match, Dewie continued to hold onto the bear hug as he screamed "Now!" to Howe, who grabbed Ace's girlfriend and valet Sarah N. Dipity and carry her kicking and screaming out of the building. * After Armageddon made the mistake of trying to perform a suicide dive on his opponent, Bayne forced Armageddon to submit to the BAYNE-BREAKER. After the match, Armageddon shook Bayne's hand and then grabbed the mike. ARMAGEDDON I want to congratulate you on a well-fought match, Bayne. It made what I have to tell you and everybody here much easier. You see, this was my final match in the HWA. It's time for Arthur Michael Gettin to hang up the boots and call it a career. I'm not as young as I used to be, and my skills in the ring have greatly diminished in the decade or so that I've performed for the fans. Of course, I won't be leaving the business forever because Mr. Helmsley has offered me a spot as a trainer in the Pinfalls In Paradise training camp. I'll be doing my best to teach the new up-and-comers what it takes to put it all on the line and entertain the fans. And I just want to say that whether you've cheered for me and jeered for me over the years, I want you all to know that I loved and appreciated every one of you who came out to see me put on these old boots and leave it all in the ring for you. Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen! (Bayne walks over and raises Arthur's arm in a sign of respect and they embrace. As Armageddon walks back up the entrance ramp, the crowd begins to repeatedly chant "Thank you, Arthur!") * 666 pinned Gangurru with the MARK OF THE BEAST. * The Ark Angels defeated the Killer Whales when Gabriel pinned with GOD'S WILL. * Holly Pena pinned Lucy Kannin with the PICANTE. * HWA HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH: Warren Peace pinned Scott Creed with the ART OF WAR to hold onto the HWA Heavyweight title. * HWA LADIES TITLE MATCH: Abercrombie [censored] became the new HWA Ladies Champion when she pinned Demiah the Devil's Daughter with I'm A [censored]. * MAIN EVENT--HWA LADIES TAG TEAM TITLE RE-MATCH[/u]: Everything Nice defeated the Queen Bees to hold onto the HWA Ladies Tag Team titles when Sugah forced "Beulah" to submit to a stretch muffler. (Whether it was Beulah or not, nobody's sure, because the Queen Bees managed to pull off their illegal "masked switch" routine during the match, for all the good it did them.)
|
|
|
Post by Dr B on May 22, 2010 22:43:48 GMT -5
Queen Bees been getting away with that masked switch for a couple of weeks now.Something has to be done!
"AB" pinned Demiah!She's got the gold...bitchin' hahaha!
Warren Peace still The Champ!Gotta love that name!
Not even Killer Whales can beat God's Will!
Bayne takes advantage of the situation!
Sarah N. Dippity didn't do so good this week.
My Girls The C&C defeated new comers Molto Bellas,cool!
Ester-Jenn/Walk of Fame getting violent!
Dr B
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 24, 2010 9:49:04 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 24, 2125 * The Blue Dragon Dojo defeated Snake Oil when Tokimasu Matsudaira pinned Flam with the Samaurai Driver. * The Progressives defeated the Deadly Sins when Guy-Koh pinned Levi Ethan with the GUY-KOH-NATOR. * Bootylicious Bertha pinned Colly Flower with a springboard corkscrew moonsault. * Perry Noya defeated Dingo when Dingo was counted out due to a springboard moonsault to the floor. * Alison Chainz defeated Mynx by count out. * The Sisters at Heart defeated 'Nuff's Enough when Ambrosia pinned Tuffy Nuff with the SNEDEKER SLAM. * Val Hailey made Halle Burton tap out to the HONORED DEAD. * Victor E. defeated Slap Stick by count out due to a springboard moonsault to the floor. * Surf's Up defeated the TNT Boyz when Body Glove pinned Terry with the WIPEOUT. * Sheik Khalid Sirhan pinned Hurricane with the ALLAH AKBAR. * Epsilon Beta pinned Ugly Coyote with the BETA MAX. * Harvard Yale pinned Devil's Reject with the IVY LEAGUE. * Pearl E. Gates pinneded Val Kira with a power slam. * : Big Poppa Roach defeated Boogie Lou to hold onto the HWA Tri-Planetary title when Boogie Lou was counted out due to a springboard moonsault to the floor. * MAIN EVENT[/i][/u] : Road-Rayge successfully defended the HWA Tag Team titles, defeating former champions the Annihilators when Rayge pinned Pthalos with the DEVASTATION.
(Several hours after the show, HWA owner and commissioner Vincent Shawn Helmsley called the entire HWA roster into the locker room for a meeting, with the exception of Armageddon, who retired last Saturday.) VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY I've taken this entire month to look over everybody's performance in the ring, and I've got to tell you, some of you impressed me, while there are several of you who look like you need some re-tooling. Therefore, as you can see on the bulletin board, there are two lists. On the left-hand list is the updated HWA roster. On the right-hand list are the names of those on the current roster who will be sent to Paradise In Pinfalls for re-training and re-tooling, beginning next month. (One by one, everybody gets up and looks on the lists for their names. Located below are those lists:) WRESTLERS/TEAMS REMAINING ON THE HWA ROSTER | WRESTLERS/TEAMS TRANSFERRED TO PIP | * WARREN PEACE * GANGURRU * SCOTT CREED * BAYNE * ACE ENDEHOLE * HURRICANE * EPSILON BETA * HERMAN GLOPP * HARVARD YALE * BIG POPPA ROACH * BOOGIE LOU * SHEIK KHALID SIRHAN * DEWIE CHEATHAM * VICTOR E. * ARK ANGELS * DESTRUCTIVE FORCES * TNT BOYZ * ROAD-RAYGE * ANNIHILATORS * SAMOAN VICE SQUAD * HOLLY PENA * BOOTYLICIOUS BERTHA * SARAH N. DIPITY * VAL HAILEY * DEMIAH THE DEVIL'S DAUGHTER * VAL KIRA * ABERCROMBIE [CENSORED] * SHANNON EGANS * EVERYTHING NICE * SISTERS AT HEART * ESTHER-JENN * C&C CONNECTION * JACKSON JILLS * QUEEN BEES * SISTERS OF PAIN * MOLTO BELLAS * 'NUFF'S ENOUGH * WALK OF FAME | * DEVIL'S REJECT * BILLY B. * DINGO * DUSTIN DeWIND * SLAP STICK * PROGRESSIVES * SURF'S UP * BLUE DRAGON DOJO * PEARL E. GATES * ALISON CHAINZ * COLLY FLOWER * 666 * KING KOBRA * UGLY COYOTE * PERRY NOYA * FLEXICON * DEADLY SINS * KILLER WHALES * SNAKE OIL * HALLE BURTON * LUCY KANNIN * MYNX |
(Aphrodi-Tina's name does not appear on either roster because on Sunday she informed Mr. Helmsley that she has decided to retire from the HWA and return to Olympica.) (Upon seeing his name on the PIP roster, Slap Stick approached Mr. Helmsley.) SLAP STICK Not to seem ungrateful to still be wrestling for you in one capacity or another, Mr. Helmsley, but are you sure you want me to go to Paradise In Pinfalls? VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY Yes, Slap Stick. Oh, don't get me wrong, you're a good performer, and God knows you make me laugh with your in-ring antics, but PIP's still getting off the ground, and I need some established HWA stars to infuse it with the energy it needs to put butts in seats, and I think you're the man who can do it. Now, can I count on you to help me? SLAP STICK Of course. Anything that brings me that much closer to the Galaxian Wrestling Federation so I can teach that idiot Tricks a thing or two about being a true clown. (Harvard Yale walks over with a scowl on his face and pushes Slap Stick out of the way) HARVARD YALE Out of my way, clown. The grown-ups have some business to discuss. (He grabs Mr. Helmsley by the lapels of his jacket.) What's the deal, Helmsley?! We had an agreement that I'd go to PIP so I could develop a new move to put my opponent's away. Now I see you've stabbed me in the back and kept me in the HWA. (Mr. Helmsley shoves Harvard Yale away.) VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY Don't test me, Yale! If you want to develop a new finisher, you can do it while you're still on the HWA roster. I had a choice of either you or 666, and you've impressed me more than him, so I chose to keep you here. Now, if that doesn't meet with your approval, I can always give you your release from your contract. So you make your decision right now. HARVARD YALE Alright! I'll stay in the HWA, but you owe me big time. VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY Don't worry, you're already the #1 contender for the HWA Heavyweight title, that should be compensation enough right there. (Harvard Yale storms out of the room.) But before you get that title shot, you'll pay for putting your hands on me.
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 25, 2010 9:12:20 GMT -5
PINFALLS IN PARADISE (An HWA Developmental Territory) HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 25, 2125 * Boss Hawg pinned Brown Starfish with a face first mat slam. * Salami Joe pinned Big Cock Murdock with the HOG TIED. (Black Sheep walks down to the ring with Bruder Galgen and Daisy Graze. The jeers of the crowd are deafening.) BLACK SHEEP Do you pathetic little substance addicts really think that you deserve an explanation for why Bruder and I put your hero, Party Harty, out of action? The only person we owe an explanation to is Party Harty. Party Harty, Bruder and I took it into our own hands to give you some time off in order for you to take a look into your own life. You, like many of these idiots in the crowd, are nothing more than an addict, and these people are your enablers. You can't function from one day to the next without taking that next drink. You're nothing more than an alcoholic and a danger not only to me, to Bruder, to Daisy Graze, but you're also a danger to yourself and everybody you step into the ring with. You, my friend, need help. You need to be like all of us in the ring and adopt a "Straight Edge" lifestyle. And I can help you, if only you'll allow me to be your personal saviour. Accept "Straight Edge" into your life, and I guarantee you, you'll never want for anything else. But don't despair. You're not the only one who needs my help. There are others on the PIP roster who can change their lives for the better. I'm talking about you, Hefhawg. You are nothing more than a pornographer and a pimp. You like to undress women, take pictures of them completely naked, and then sell those pictures to these pornographic addicts in the crowd. You need to repent your wicked ways and embrace "Straight Edge". In fact, I'm begging you right now to come down to the ring, get on your knees, take my hand and accept me as your personal savior. I can save you, and...(Black Sheep points to every member of the audience) I can save all of you. (The crowd erupts as Hefhawg steps through the curtain with a buxom beauty under each arm.) HEFHAWG I thank you for your generous offer, Black Sheep, but I must respectfully decline. You see, if I were to become just like you, I could never love myself, and neither would my ladies. In the meantime, I have a gift for every member of the audience 21 years of age and older...a free copy of the latest issue of Playground. In fact, Black Sheep, I'm going to give you a free copy as well. In fact, pay very close attention to this month's centerfold. (The videoscreen displays a censored version of the Playground centerfold...Daisy Graze. Daisy stands rigid in the ring with a look of shock on her face while Black Sheep and Bruder look on in disbelief.) BLACK SHEEP What is this? Where did you get that picture? HEFHAWG My, my, my. It seems that a skeleton has come out of Ms. Daisy's closet. She never told you how several years ago, she posed for Playground. I think I'm going to title this photo "Shear Delight". What do you you think? (Black Sheep and Bruder leave the ring to chase after Hefhawg, who runs backstage with his "lady friends" as Daisy, who even though is fully clothed, leaves the ring area, "covering her nudity" and screaming "Don't Look At Me!") * The Samoan Cannibals defeated Animosity when Samoan Enforcer pinned Flaw with the BELLYSPLAT. Virtue and Flaw scowled at each other as they walked back to the locker room. * As The Flock looked on from the top of the entrance ramp, "Big Kitty Snooze No-Sell" Kevin Gnash pinned Hefhawg for the second week in a row with the BIG EASY POWER BOMB. After the match, Black Sheep and Bruder Galgen rushed the ring, but Hefhawg slid out of the ring and escaped through the crowd. * Calico pinned Princess Barbelle with the Adorable Face Claw. * LAX defeated the Masters of Darkness when, after the M.O.D. hit the DARK DROP on Pouch, Skrit came in to make the save and Prince of Darkness attempted to stop him, but as the referee was escorting P.O.D. back to his corner, Skrit dropped an elbow on King of Darkness and put Pouch on top of him, enabling Pouch to get the 1-2-3 on King of Darkness for the pinfall victory. * Umagapotamus pinned LAX member Bandito with the Hanging Flying Hippo Head Butt. * Chickfighter pinned Maiden Patriot with the ASS-SAULT. * The next match up was scheduled to be Mousawa taking on Flock member Bruder Galgen. As the match got underway, the censored Playground centerfold picture of Daisy Graze popped up on the video screen, and Daisy ran out of the arena, covering herself once again with her arms. Mousawa would go on to pin Bruder with a deathjump cross body block. * Kailani defeated Dolly Lamma by count out by way of a springboard moonsault to the floor. * The SlamPigs defeated the Kings of the Swamp by disqualification following a brawl outside the ring between Ali Ga'Tor and Boar. * : The Damn Dirty Apes defeated Zero Gravity to become the new PIP Tag Team champions when Chimpan-Z pinned Shooting Star with the GOIN' APE. * MAIN EVENT[/U][/I] : Davey Storm successfully defended the PIP Heavyweight title when he pinned Saint Bernard with the RUNNING POWER SLAM. Next week on Pinfalls In Paradise, the HWA wrestlers and teams who were transferred to PIP will begin making their debuts, and Zero Gravity will get the opportunity to win back the PIP Tag Team belts. Join us then, and be sure to continue to join us Saturdays and Mondays for great HWA action.
RANKINGS (For the period ending May 25, 2125) : Davey Storm 1. Razorback 2. Ugly Coyote 3. King Kobra 4. Bruder Galgen 5. Mousawa 6. Umagapotamus 7. Billy B. 8. Perry Noya 9. Saint Bernard 10. Bandito 10. : Damn Dirty Apes 1. Zero Gravity 2. PigWrestling 3. SlamPigs 4. Samoan Cannibals 5. Progressives 6. Masters of Darkness 7. Kings of the Swamp 8. Killer Whales 9. Blue Dragon Dojo 10. Deadly Sins : (TBD) 1. Kailani 2. Chickfighter 3. Maiden Patriot 4. Princess Barbelle 5. Pearl E. Gates 6. Alison Chainz 7. Mynx 8. Lucy Kannin 9. Halle Burton 10. Calico 11. Colly Flower 12. Dolly Lamma 13. Daizy Graze
|
|
|
Post by barnestormer on May 29, 2010 3:08:17 GMT -5
HEAVENLY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HWA Arena; Deimos, Mars
May 29, 2125 * The Annihilators defeated the Destructive Forces when Phtlos pinned Volcano with the PTHALO-CUTTER. * Without Sarah N. Dipity in his corner due to her abduction last week by Dewie Cheatham and Howe, Ace Endehole struggled to defeat Victor E., but in the end, with his heart not truly in the match, he was pinned by the VICTOR E. PRESS. * The Samoan Vice Squad defeated the TNT Boyz when Tika pinned Terry with a jumping ddt. * Herman Glopp pinned Hurricane with the GLOPP DROP. * Gangurru pinned Dewie Cheatham (who came down to ringside with Howe pulling Sarah N. Dipity along by a choke chain as if she were a dog) with a deathjump cross body block. After the match, Ace Endehole charged into the ring, but Dewie and Howe grabbed Sarah and forced her to escape with them through the crowd out of the arena with Ace in hot pursuit. * Scott Creed pinned Sheik Khalid Sirhan by MY SACRIFICE. * 2-ON-1 HANDICAP MATCH: Much to HWA owner/commissioner Vincent Shawn Helmsley's chagrin, Harvard Yale was able to defeat Epsilon Beta and Bayne when he pinned Bayne with a backbreaker. * Big Poppa Roach pinned Boogie Lou with the Invincible to retain the HWA Tri-Planetary belt. * MAIN EVENTRE-MATCH Demiah the Devil's Daughter pinned Abercrombie [censored] with the DEVIL'S SEED to re-capture the HWA Ladies title.
(Several hours later, Vincent Shawn Helmsley is in his office working at his desk when there's a knock at the door.) VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY Come in. (The door opens, and Bayne walks into the office.) Ah, Bayne. Thank you for coming. BAYNE You wanted to see me, Mr. Helmsley? VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY Yes...(There's another knock at the door.) Come in. (The door opens and Epsion Beta walks in) Excellent. I can kill two birds with one stone. You two disappointed me out there tonight. I wanted one or the other to pin Harvard Yale, not get pinned by him. I gave you carte blanche to do anything you wanted to in the ring against Mr. Yale, just so long as he came out the loser of the match, and what did you do? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!! You know, I was going to give whomever pinned Harvard a shot at the HWA Heavyweight title on Monday, but now, I have to give that opportunity to Harvard. No, scratch that. Harvard will get to face Warren Peace on Monday...in a non-title match. EPSILON BETA Wait a minute, Mr. Helmsley. If you're looking for someone to do your dirty work for you, you'd better look elsewhere, because I'm not doing anything that's going to make me look bad in the fans' eyes. VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY Is that the way you feel as well, Bayne? BAYNE I've always said to myself ever since I got myself suspended last year that I'd do nearly anything to get back in the hunt for the HWA Heavyweight title, but I've got to admit that there's a limit as to what I'll do. VINCENT SHAWN HELMSLEY That's fine. Tell you what, Epsilon. I'm going to take your advice. I'm going to find somebody else to 'do my dirty work,' as you so eloquantly put it. Therefore, I'm sending the two of you to Pinfalls In Paradise, and I'm going to hand-pick two members of the PIP roster who can do what you two idiots are too scared to do. Now get out of my office!
|
|